At the dark of midnight. 

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I had once locked a lover of mine outside

The lover if I am honest, he was mine

‘The’ would suggest he could have been past, present, future

How cruel to pair two things with a destiny so putrid

Yet I have wished to go back in time, but the rain would fall backwards

and the oscillating effect of your body entering the bed would see me leaving the bed and leaving the room backwards

Then you might take care to watch my face and think the next time before you knock my life out of it’s place

Before one minute the outline of my being scribbles across my head and marks a reconfiguration, a new plan

That requires this part, and this part and this part

An artisan is what you are. How obvious it would be to call you the creator of my true self.

I remember what it is like to sit on your shelf

And yet,

I can’t remember what it was like to have you by myself

Without this endless staircase of egotistical abuse

That I had been stuck on long before I locked you out and peeped through the keyhole to see if you had been reduced by the hot summer rain

I wished to sip you up and throw the rest down the drain
Something about his smile, his eyes

The way he’d wait for my thighs

How I destroyed his curiosity with my sad, slithering eyes
His ears often bled when I tore at my insides

With all our beautiful physical things and golden bodies combined
We grew to unknow our glossy hands, which rubbed on chests, like magic lamps that were peppered with emeralds and gold on the inside.
The clogging of my heart was intermittent, just wouldn’t kill in time

So when his love stopped nursing each beat, it slowly, slowly, slowly died
The past goes to bed with me now, bathed with me like he often did
My stomach hid under bubbles, my breathing drove inwards when we’d cuddle, it wasn’t just physical no

It was the way that we would huddle when it would rain, I’d love the rain

Like him, I would rejoice every time it came

Because it meant that this world is reliable and still the same

Couldn’t have saved us, the police were outside when you fell out of love because you had already confessed yet you forgot to wear gloves

And you left your fingerprints all across me and the many things we fucked on

Hold on

Love had taken us both

No matter what it took us both

Side by side at the hospital, cuffed to the bed

I might plea that he go free and off into the night

Like you did that time, in the rain naked, at the dark of midnight.

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